"Life is about relationships; the rest is just details" -Gary Smalley

"It is easier to raise strong children than it is to repair broken men" -Fredrick Douglass

"Women might be able to fake orgasms, but men can fake a whole relationship." -Anonymous

"Anxiety is love's greatest killer. It makes others feel as you might when a drowning man holds onto you. You want to save him, but you know he will strangle you with his panic." -Anais Nin

"Some of us think holding on makes us strong; but sometimes it is letting go." -Anonymous

"We had a lot in common. I loved him and he loved him." -Anonymous

"Above all, be true to yourself, and if you cannot put your heart in it, take yourself out of it." -Hardy D. Jackson

Monday, January 4, 2010

Men and the Little Black Dress (LBD)

The little black dress, or better known as LBD, has been around since the early 1920's and has become a staple of must haves in your closet. It is a simple, classic, and timeless dress that can be worn for any occasion. The LBD comes in coutless styles, fabrics, and fits and is a true reflection of a womans core fashion identity. But the LBD can be used to understand much more than just a womans fashion sense, it is a great analogy to understand what the perfect man for her is.
To understand this simile of men are like your perfect lil black dress you first have to understand what qualities make the dress and the man alike. Like everyone we are individually unique. Ironic, but true. And since the LBD comes in a number of styles so you can pick the perfect one; the one that you know is the perfect fit, fabric, size, style, and looks amazing on you; you know that no matter how long it may sit in your closet you can pull it out and it will work. Like your perfect man, he is tailored for you. You know that you have great chemistry and work well together (style), he knows how much independence and support you want (fit and size), he knows how to meet your needs and expectations (fabric), and he brings you to a new level of confidence that expands your heart, mind, and soul (LBD). You know that these simple categorical qualities make a man the perfect fit for you, but that doesn't mean that you don't shop around first. And it may mean that you have to shop at many different stores and try on many different dresses, but like the perfect lil black dress you know when you look in the mirror if its the one or not. The mirror in this analogy is the symbol of everything you expect, want, need and deserve. It is the reflection of the deepest and most honest critic; you. The mirror maynot be what you always want to face, maybe because you really like the dress but know that it needs too much tailoring (the man who just isn't compatable with you) or cost to much (the man who is too much maintance and drains you) or just doesn't fit right but its on sale (the man who doesn't meet all your expectations but your settling) or its a great dress but its just not the right size (your expectations maybe met but overall your needs are met and you are left unfufilled). These are all real reflections of reasons we stay in unhappy and unfufilling relationships (on a varying scale of sevarity of course). This blog explores this simile of men and the little black dress and I encourage you to follow it, but this blog isn't only about men because as we all know they are only a number of them out there, but its more so about the difference between boys and men and how to find the right man for you.
What is the difference between a boy and man and what can a boy be compared to? Well if a man is the perfect LBD than a boy would only have to be a consinment shop dress. You think you like the consignment shop dress and so you buy it because you think you can pull out that potential and revamp it into the Cinderella dress that everyone will admire. BUT YOUR WRONG!! That boy will not become a man because you want him to and no matter how much you try to help or change him he will still be a boy. The likely hood of the consignment shop dress turning out to your expectations of being the bell of the ball is mind numblingly low. The amount of alterations needed is a waste of your time. However, it is too tempting and so you give in and buy it and try to make the alterations, but never finish them and there for never get to wear it. Its the perfect similie. Boys are tempting fixer uppers that women cave into because we think we can change them, (the down fall of our nurturing ways) but when we try the fabric rips and your left with a tattered dress and heart. Why go through all that trouble when you could just wait and save up for that perfect LBD.
Again I hope you follow this blog becuase I will explore many more issues that dig deeper into the differences of boys and men, including daily sacrafice in relationships, media influence on men, mama's boys, needs versus wants, talk is cheap, how to maintain your LBD (renewing and maintaining your relationship), and many many more topics. I will use my own experiences and relationships to give great entertaining examples. If you ever have a good example or would like to bring up a subject to explore please feel free. I can't wait to write again!

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